Army Man

Everyone wants to be a little badass sometimes, and most often this means that you wind up with a leather jacket and a motorcycle. But you don’t need to make any permanent life changing decisions if you just want to be badass for a little while, you could make it happen for Halloween. There are many different ways to do this of course, from simply picking out things that you’ve always wanted to try and dressing as such; for example the leather jacket thing I was talking about. (You could spice it up with one of those ‘fake tattoo sleeves’ to give the illusion of ink, if you wanted.) To making a costume so over-the-top amazing that everyone will forever consider you the most badass Halloween party-goer in the history costume of their lives.

While browsing the internet it’s easy to see who attempted, and who accomplished this goal. One such man probably had a thought process that went along the lines of ‘the military is definitely badass, but there’s nothing too special in dressing in a uniform. I know what would be cool, being a toy army soldier.’ Now, this doesn’t sound too impressive on paper, but the way he went about doing it is what made it so incredibly amazing and unique. This man got himself a uniform, boots, gun, and helmet just like the little toy soldiers wore, and painted them all the same shade of green. But that wasn’t enough, he painted himself green too. As you can see from the photo, it had a jaw-dropping spectacular effect. If he showed up to a Halloween party I was throwing, he would win ALL the costume contest prizes.

Sometimes the way to be the most badass isn’t by attempting to look tough, but by having a unique idea and making it a reality in as flawless a way as you can manage. You’ll be remembered for decades, and it will rock.

Bill the beekeeper

There are some pretty dangerous jobs out there that it takes a special kind of person to get up and go to work every day. Risking life and limb for our benefit, these people deserve an applause every time they clock in. Lucky for you, their jobs could also make for some pretty hilarious Halloween costumes.

For example, say that your friends are really into Eddie Izzards comedy acts. If they are they would know one of the particularly funny jokes wherein he screams “Ah! I’m covered in bees!” (for those of who you have no idea what I’m talking about, please watch this clip.) If you went to a Halloween party dressed as a bee keeper you could milk that joke for all it was worth, especially if you were in-fact, covered in bees. All it would take are little yellow and black pompom balls that you get from the craft store. Just stick them all over yourself.

Or say, you wanted to dress as a job a little less obscure, you could go to the party as a SeaWorld Employee. Of course, this costume would have a bit of a twist to it. For example, you could buy as stuffed animal shark (or dangerous sea creature of your choice) and cut a slit where the mouth opens. Remove a bit of the stuffing and stick your hand or forearm in (depending on how big the stuffed animal is), to give the illusion that you’ve been bitten by something and it decided it was never letting go.

Then there is the very well know costume of the ‘snake charmer’, this one tends to get a little dirty; but if you don’t have any shame, then go for it. Your friends will either be laughing their butts off or will be solemnly shaking their heads in disapproval.

But does it really matter what they think, as long as you’re having fun?